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both of us (GG got paid by ROIR, I got to stand on stage while a naked man
threw his own feces at a terrified audience), that further gigs and records were to follow.

Sadly, this awesome partnership was short-lived. Frustrated with my
musical incompetence, GG fired me and I was replaced by a man with one-arm and a big pin through his face. I became frustrated with GG's physical inconti-
nence and fired him from his massive Homestead contract and replaced him
with a Simon & Garfunkel-esque duo from Milwauke known as the Frogs.

When Mets games are on in the UK at 1am do you tape them or stay up?

Since England's Channel 5 is the only outlet for live baseball coverage,
my options are rather limited. Ch. 5 (also the home of many exciting films starring Suzanne Pleshette) features whatever ESPN's Sunday or Wednesday
night game happens to be, and as you might guess, the Yankees tend to be featured more often than the Mets. I stay up when I can, but must confess that
on more than one occasion I've gone to snoozyland and had to watch the tape
the following morning. All of the games can be heard via the Internet, though perhaps some of them shouldn't be.

Were you one to start fistfights as a kid?

No. I was one to lose fistfights as a kid, but through the use of various
props over the years (spectacles, crutches, iron lung), I've managed to look sympathetic enough that few people feel comfortable hitting me. In public, at least.

Fondest Craig Koon memory:

You make it sound like he's dead! Surely Craig's finest moments are still
ahead of him?

How has Internet fan culture changed the nature of independent music?

I get the impression that there's a better exchange of information (if not
ideas) and if you're hooked up internet-wise, you don't need to be nearly so dependent on payola-controlled radio, plugger-controlled print media, co-op ruled retail, etc. Not that they haven't made their way online, too.

Is having Bush in office going to produce better music?

I don't know, what does he sound like? He couldn't be any worse a
recording artist than Roger Clinton.

Does anyone ever call you "The Coz?"

Not if they want me to keep putting out their records.

What about just "Coz?"

See above.

How come you didn't like the Replacements?

I liked them just fine until they started sucking.

What is your favorite football logo?

Old-style New England/Boston Patriots logo with the goofy guy with the
tri-corner hat. One of the ugliest logos in all of professional sports and if they brough it back, it would be a massive improvement over the one they've got

26 Geek Weekly #9

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