Austin Fanzine Project

[clip art of a dictionary illustration for 'anamorphosis', and a letter to the editor from Tower Records' PULSE! magazine: 'Like a hurricane - Dear PULSE!, Much of the music I hear today can do the proverbial "knock me over with a feather" thing. MTV is still doing a great bang-up job. Rock is alive and well. After all these years, themes haven't changed, although variances and talents of artists still grow and increase inwardly and outwardly. God bless all of the hard time rockers in our great amphitheater. Gary Leonard, Uniondale, N.Y.']

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in the corridor when we had reached the height of boredom. It was so good to see him instead of another chick with frosted hair, stretch jeans and highheeled faux cowboy boots.

But what made me really sad was when I came home and listened to some old Stones records searching for some clue, some foreshadowing, some bit of crap that could have been the start of their road to Aerosmithdom. I couldn't find it. All I found was their lost genius. Great fucking classic songs. Great music and twists and lyrics that lead one to believe that Mick and the baoys knew exactly what was up. I love that stuff! I totally respect it. Beggar's Banquet, you know? Excellent! What the fuck happened?

Do they know they suck? Do they just keep crankin' this shit out for the fuck of it? Cause they wanna see how much money people will lay down for this shit? How do they live with themselves? Or do they actually believe in what they are doing? Impossible!

The Rolling Stones have degenerated farther than any band in history. I mean, "Sympathy For The Devil," "You Can't Always Get What You Want," "Off My Back," versus "The Sparks Will Fly"? I mean, really guys! What is this shit? Pablum. I don't want any of it.

And then the topper: A glossy flyer ad for the Rolling Stones MasterCard! I kid you fucking not! Is that the most disgusting thing you have ever heard of, or what? I would hate it even more than OK Cola or XLent except that it's aimed at Baby Boomers and I think that's kinda funny (most of them probably love the idea!) Icky! Icky!!

Tomato Time

Ok, so (I think I'm gonna start every piece in this issue with "Ok, so...") Ok, so, we went into Tower Records the other night to look at zines or books or something, and we go offered a sample of fucking Calvin Klein perfume! I said, "So how is it that you got hooked up passing out perfume samples?" He said, "Because One is a new, unique fragrance specially formulated for use by both men and women!" "OH MY GOD!!. "I shrieked, "now I can piece it all together. A record store. A new unique fragrance. A perfect match!" What the fuck folks? I guess I should have seen it coming when I went to the super-mega-Tower in Chicago. It was like a fucking mall in there! It had CD's, tapes, books, magazines, zines, clothes, everything except records. They should change their name or something. Tower Perfume (and shit).

GANK ALERT: Do not, I repeat, do not buy the November 1994 issue of High Society with "Bad Girl Barrymore's Bare Breasts." It sucks. It's 6 bucks and all it has is some movie stills and a picture of a breast, it's not necessarily hers even, cause it's not even attached to a body. Well here's the best parts:

Just rent some of her movies. Poison Ivy is really hot and Doppelganger is a really predictable horror flick. It's really bad, but you get to see her bein' sexy and all. And Gun Crazy is good and violent and it has a cameo by Joe Dallesandro of Warhol fame!