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this morning Dr Ingalls call to see me. we had solemn
conversation to gether a bout my Dear Son and Lydia
and his wife he mention the lost of a brother that affected him
very much, then he thought that he never should feel a
gain so but when he was call to part with his wife
his grief was grater, I told him when I look at his
son. there he had one to bear his name up, I am
like absolem, he said that he had no choice and
if all his children were daughters he would be contented
then why thus heavy, O my soul,
say, why distrustful still:
thy thoughts with vain impatience roll
on scenes of future ill