p.

Letter No 84 Monday, Nov. 24th

Major J.H. Massey
6th Palestinian Coy., The Buffs
M.E.F.

My own darling Barbara

I really did feel to dull & dreary to write any
letter last night - so this is now Tuesday. Instead I wrote
you an A.G. & then did some work.

Darling - I have now sent off my official application to
be posted home on compassionate grounds. By the time
you receive this letter, you will know the result, one
way or the other. I did not tell you before because I thought
this letter might reach you quickly by some freak &
if you had not already heard some result from me,
you would be on pins & worrying & over disappointed
at failure, whereas, if the first word you get is that
it has failed, it will probably be not very much
more than you expected. Anyway, it is all as nothing
now, & I can only wait results. A letter came round early
last week, sayng the next lot of postings would
be in December - pointing out that so many - a very
small number of officer vacancies were for this Command
& inviting applications. So I told one long story - &
also drew attention to the fact that I had worked
hard & I thought done my best & done well. Col. Leicester
is the first hurdle & if he sends it on, it has to be sent
on by another H.Q. before reaching the final judges.
So now it is very much a matter of competition & also
of luck - because there is no criterion or standard of
degree of compassion - & it depends entirely on how
some man or men view our case. We know only
too well what the losses & tragedies of the last two years
have done to me & to our lives - but it is not an easy