Letter from Harry Massey to Barbara Massey

Saturday 23 May. Major J.H. Massey 6 Palestinian Coy The Buffs M.E.F

Dearest darling Barbara

I had some good news this evening, about posting home. I told you that I had sent off my last application together with a request for an interview with the Area Commander . Well - his Staff Captain telephoned me this evening to say that there was no need for me to come, that the A.C. remembered my case & fully believed in what I said, & that he was sending it up with his strong recommendation. So I suppose I must feel very satisfied with that & now be on pins for 3-4 weeks, waiting to see what happens. It seems silly in a way, to be telling you this, because when you get this letter I shall be on the high seas coming home to you - or else you will already have had a cable reporting my 3rd failure. But if it is to be failure, I want you to know what I have done. I really do not know what to think this time - I felt confidence the first time, & even a little more, the second. But I feel rather wary now - before, I spent so many weeks hopeing & on tip toe & then suffered two heavy blows. But I cannot help hoping. Just think of it darling - home in September! All the thrill & joy that that would mean - & just in time to save you from another winter, & me too. Is it safe to make any plans? I expect I would arrive at Liverpool or Glasgow & would probably have time to telephone you or send you a

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wire. Otherwise, I will just arrive in London & will telephone you from there; has Juliette got a phone? But it would be a good thing to have some place where we could leave messages for each other. So - if I am stuck & have not been able to get in touch with you, I will go to the Plaza Hotel, if it still stands & does business; & if not I will then go to Hughes' house, 97, Harley St Oh darling, how wonderful if I really am making plans to come home so soon.

If you know that it is another failure by the time you get this letter, you must not feel too sorry for me. I shall be sticking it out somehow - there is no alternative - I shall be loving you not one little bit less, & still thinking of & hoping for the day when I do come home.

My dear, I received Gordon's I.T. letter & your note on it. you had had it in your bag or somewhere, most careless of you - lovely & sad. It is all bloody complicated & I really cannot work it out without having all the facts & figures, but I cannot find anything wrong. Lord knows what the tax will be this year, what with major's pay & back pay, possible deductions at source already made, & commission if any. But I reckon your figure of £450 remaining to be about right. So long as field allowance goes on, I think I can manage on £100 from home; & if you spend £5 p.w. that is £250 - & your ma's £60; so that leaves £40 saved which is not so bad for living separately & helping your ma too.

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I am doing my best. Last month, my mess bill was the lowest I have had yet - & I have brought off some more coups with my clothes. Those three pale khaki shirts from Cole, on which I had the collars turned twice last summer were quite worn out again; & so the tailor has made new collars from their tail flaps, & very neartly sewed up some tears. And also the two wool shirts from Cole had worn out collars, & I suddenly realised I had two spares, & so now they have been fixed on. Quite a triumph, I felt, & rubbed my hands together like an old miser. The same tailor has also patched up the two pairs of shorts from P.Rs, & they are now in use again. Clothes are an awful price now - 25/- for shorts, which used to cost 8/- & £1 for a very ordinary shirt, which was 6/-. I feel that this is just one more little reason for coming home in July this patching & repairing cannot go on forever. I am not in the best writing form tonight - & have taken two hours to get this far. But I keep stopping to think about coming home - it is almost too big & wonderful to imagine. To really be with you, & at the worst to be in the same smallish country & be able to go & see each other by means of such small things as buying a railway ticket or getting a few days leave. But I must not write about it any more until something happens - but I cannot prevent myself from thinking. I shall go to bed & think now. XXX H.

Monday May 25th We had roast

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duck & green peas, & a bottle of Cacinel Hock for dinner last night - so I felt in a better mood towards my officers than I usually do, & stayed in the mess & talked until midnight. You must not think from that remark that I am on bad terms with my officers - quite the opposite really. But I usually come to my room & write or read, when I have finished work & dinner is over. And when I am not writing to you, or else reading to improve my mind for you, I always have the sensation of wasting time. I am wasting time tonight, by going to have dinner at another R.A.F. station where I ahve men on duty - but there is a very pleasant Wing Commander there who has been asking me for weeks, & I felt it to be impolite to refuse & make excuses any more. Tomorrow I am going out, but not wasting time - I am having dinner with Barstein & then going to see the Palestine Orchestra playing with the Gertrude Kraus Ballet - the combination is said to be very good indeed & I am looking forward to it. I hope the mention of duck does not make you very envious - & I hope that the new ration cuts allow you & Maxie to feed well enough. You said in a p.c. that Juliette's was the best place you had been in so far, for food. There is a certain amount of rationing here now, of such things as flour, & there are meatless days - but these things only affect the civilians - & of course the cost of living is much higher ^ restaurant prices a scandal. Army rations remain excellent, & we do not seem to have much trouble in getting the various extras.

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You said in one letter that you had heard that German officers mess with their men - I do not know if that is true or not, I rather doubt it - but I am quite certain that it is an excellent idea from every point of view. The officers could have their own table or tables in the men's mess room - just the same as the prefects' table at school; & the batmen would serve the food, which would be exactly the same as the men's. By this means, the soldiers could never get the idea that officers take the best of the rations, & the best cooks & so on. the officers would have their own private sitting room or tent, & so would the Sgts. And if that arrangement caused officers to lose dignity or authority, then they do not deserve to be officers. Your idea that the officers get the best of the rations, then the Sgts, & the soldiers what is left, really has no foundation at all, except in very bad order units. You see, there is a ration scale, & the stuff is divided up according to numbers. But officers' food is very much better cooked, & a sirloin is roasted as such, & not cut up into stew, & then of course they pay 2,3, 4, & 5/- a day to supplement their rations. That is the wrong part - if the ration scale is good enough for a soldier to train & fight on, then it should be enough for officers & sgts. And the answer would be to reduce officers' pay, & thereby narrow the enormous difference between it & a private's - & at the same time -- 1. stop all this extra food to which officers mess's are not really entitled; 2. save an enormous number of men by relieving officers & sgts messes cooks & waiters & fatiguemen;