Letters from World War II : J.H. Massey

4.

But I am not giving up yet, so please do not think that. And anyway, the first string to my bow, is to try & be sent home.

Nina, by the way, is now teaching Art at the English school in Haifa, which she enjoys very much. Children of all ages & English, Jews, Arabs, Greeks, & all kinds of Europeans - she says the Greeks are easily the most intelligent & talented. But she is afraid her ideas are too modern for the Head mistress!

On Sunday, I went to Nathanya with Arkin to the opening of a new Soliders Home & Canteen. His brother in law, Ben Anni was of course the prime mover - but it all gave me the impression that Ben-Annis had it all worked out as to how much good in business this desirable publicity would be to him. Maybe I am being unkind & unfair. They all gave the impression of being overjoyed to see me & tried to persuade me to stay this night - but I am quite sure Arkin has told them how I run him around & generally push him about. The best part of the day was a bathe we had in the sea. It was a very hot day, but the water was just nicely nippy & it really was lovely.

The weather is really incredible. You will remember me telling you how cold it was. I had actually stepped into woolies & was wearing service dress at night. And now I am wearing the bare minimum again & feeling damn hot at that. But the weather will break properly any day now.

I'm afraid I'm feeling pretty browned off with work at the moment, & I think the main reason is the H.Q. staff of this new Area I am in.

5.

The Area Commander being Col Leicester is alright, because he knows me & I know him. The next man is the Brigade Major - in the last place he was an awfully decent bloke & very able & sensible & good to work with. Here, the man is just a bloody fool & so goddamned pleased with himself - the very worst type of Regular Army officer. I dislike him intensely, which I'm quite sure he knows & so there is not so much love lost. He comes round & talks absolute balls about my camouflage & the lessons of Crete & its just all rubbish. Bloody man. And the rest of them are just idle, silly & useless which is bad enough, but I just cannot bear incompetent importance.

It is really rather a pity, after my excellent terms with the last Area & as Col Leicester is now here. But I just cannot be friendly & polite to people whom I dislike & despise. But it does not worry me a very great deal, so don't take me too seriously darling.

I'm afraid I'm not writing you a very interesting or thrilling letter & I am going to finish this on the other side of this page & so send you a six page letter, which is against my principles & rules & which I have not done for a long time. But the combination of circumstances is all too much for me at the moment. An incredibly dull life & nothing happening at all & no word from you. It does not mean that I do not think about you, darling because I do more & more - or that I do not feel in touch with you because I do - or at least in sympathy if not very much in touch. But it is

6.

just a bad patch & is getting me down a bit. And though I think for hours & hours about you, & my whole life continues to revolve round you. I do not seem to have the heart to write very much about my thoughts & about you & about Max. Perhaps & I think it has something to do with the war situation. It is so tense & tremendous. I am watching it so eagerly & always & only in connection with when & how it can end & so bring you & I [?] together again. It is now over four months since the Nazis attacked Russia & always it seems that soon things will go in a decisive way. And I watch movements of troops & aircraft out here, for another smash in the Western Desert. And the bombing of Italy & what that may mean. And American politics. And what is Japan going to do. It is all so tremendous, & so horribly slow & long drawn out. I know the result of the war, just as well as you do, & millions of others, but it is all taking such a ghastly long time. And I long with all my heart & soul to be with you, my darling Barbara. Nothing else in this world can give me even the slightest satisfaction, & still less so when compared with my passionate longing to be with you. How can I arrange & organise my life when that is how I feel & always will & certainly more & more. I do hope my next letter will be a better & brighter & longer one. I'm very fit & well darling. Eternal love to you my sweetheart. H. XXXX

Letter No 81

Wednesday - Nov 5th

Major J.H. Massey 6 Palestinian Coy, The Buffs M.E.F.

My darling own Barbara

It is 11.0 o'clock. I am going to bed very soon. I have been working all evening on instructions & orders for a long march & scheme & night out, which I am talking 1/2 the coy tomorrow - postponed from last week; & I have to be up bright & early in the morning for an early start. But I posted off, this morning, a rather dull & dreary, & I'm afraid very short letter & so I want to at least make a start with my next one & try to make amends. There was still no letter or anything from you today but for some reason, I am feeling cheerful & quite happy tonight - & I am hoping hard that I have an intuition that some post has now arrived. I shall have it tomorrow or very soon after.

I was thinking this morning about my morale & the affect which your letters have upon it. And this then made me wish that my morale was as good as my morals. It is, perhaps, rather a weak sort of a [?] - but so many people out here seem to allow their morals to assist their morale & so manage to pass the time & even enjoy themselves more than they would if they were at home & with their wives & families. For myself, I do not really think about it at all as a matter of my morals - I just love you to the exclusion of everybody & everything else & that is the beginning & the end of the matter.

I am looking forward to the next two days - no office work - some good hard marching - a night out in the open & in my valise & camp cooking & so on

2.

the weather is lovely & the moon full & high. It will be a grand change.

To bed now & continue on Friday - good night sweetest Barbara - XXXX H.

Sunday - Nov. 9th - My two day's march turned out to be quite a gruelling affair, & only about now I am sufficiently back to normal to carry on my letter to you.

On Thursday, we covered 18 miles, our objective was 2000 ft higher than the starting point & the going was rough & rocky. This was my first march since N. Ireland & so I felt pretty ruined by the end of the day & my poor feet were about raw. The weather too, was as trying as it possibly could be - frightfully hot & a blazing sun, & one of these foul Khamsseir had to appear & blow all the time. I was very sorely tempted to make the return journey by track but felt that I must go on in some way or other. The return was 14 miles & cross country all the way & hotter than ever. I really thought I was not going to make it, but somehow I did. Never have I been so pleased & relieved to reach home - even if home did consist of my own bloody barrack square in the bloody camp. It really was very arduous & the men did well. They have been on training for two months & doing 4 or 5 mile marches several times a week. It was all a bit too sudden for me. And it is always much more difficult when you have to go to the head & be responsible

3.

for the pack & the route & everything else. My batman being as unused to marching as myself, was unable to make the return march - another rather panty type packed up, saying he had a heart attack & Jim Headley collapsed about 2 miles from home - & otherwise we finished all complete. But apart from the strain, it was all a great success - with the exception of the wretched Hohr, who did so many things wrong, & so many silly things - that I simply could not bear to see him again that day. I went off to Tel-Aviv with Ben in the Austin & had a nice dinner & home early to bed. And last night, I was in bed at 9.30 & had a solid 10 hours until 7.30 this morning & now feel much better. It is really most interesting getting among the Arabs because that is more or less what one is bound to do if one gets out into the hills & villages. The Jews are all in the towers or else in their settlements & colonies. it is a pity I cannot talk to them or understand a word they are saying because they go off into long stories, all very theatrical & tense & they always sound so interesting. That is always another advantage of having Ben with me, as he speaks Arabic.

I had your two page Airgraph yesterday - of Oct. 10th & both pages miraculously arrived together. If the first had arrived without the second, it would have been infuriating & the other way round would have been baffling. You were worried darling that my cable may have been indiscreet but I don't think that there is any need to worry about that. It just stated plainly what I intended & wanted to do. And I had already asked advice from the Area Commander & it was he who had advised

4.

the medical certificate if possible. You sounded fearful about the journey by sea, my darling. I'm afraid that in spite of the letters & things I have written discussing all the pros & cons & the real end of the matter is that the sea journey is too much & too dangerous with or without Maxie. In any case, you would not leave Max. I would not ask you or want you to & I expect I would think it strange if you would yourself. So it is left for me to try & be sent home. I cannot begin to try until the next applications are called for & that may be soon or it may be a long time. And if that fails, then we just have to wait for the war to come to an end. And I really cannot see it going on for another year. And darling, there is a great deal to be said for coming home to you - with it all ended & a month or so of leave or holiday. & then starting out together again. We could get into an awful mess out here- if you were evacuated to LA or if I were sent off somewhere else & then maybe arriving home separately. We could have an awful time. I spend an awful amount of money & generally get out of our depth. but I shall still explore, darling - just in case there is a safer & easier & more sure way.

I also had a pc. from my ma - which took two months & she had just received the snaps of you & Max & me & Peter. I gather she does not like the name Max. In a

5.

previous letter she spoke of David & in this one she called him "your boy". As I told you before, he seems to be irrevocably Max now. I wonder if your mind is made up or whether you are still wondering.

I also had sea mail letters from Frost & Gladys - July & Aug respectively. Frost said he had written three times before - but I have not had any of them. Things sound a bit grim at the Works, owing to cotton control & resultant shortage of that commodity, so essential to us - but they seem to be keeping their end up which is the main thing. He sent good wishes & interesting messages from various people. Barker of Cn. E. Hermitage he told me had left under a cloud at Xmas. I was v. sorry to hear this. And George Hallas is now a 2nd Lieut. Gladys wrote "Dear Mr. Massey" which was refreshing & sensible of her. She was overjoyed about Maxie - kind soul. She said it would have done my heart good to have seen them all in the office when they heard from you that I was a major - but not to get too attached to a mililtary life because they wanted me back again. What a hope! Also that my new office is grand - but that had I been there some things might have been different & dark hints that the "powers that

6.

be" as when Northe did not take much interest in it. And she has a grand new Super Speed typewriter - u z gas! Nobody mentioned the unfortunate Willie - some gather he is about the same as usual. I sent the poor little bum a Xmas card - & felt rather hypocritical doing it - but I could hardly leave him out.

I told you in my last letter that I could not bear the Brigade Major here - however I saw him this morning & he was all beams & smiles. I went & had a drink with him & generally hobnobbed which is more sensible of me really, because one never knows when such people may be useful & also they can turn nasty & do one harm. But I still don't like him - in fact I like him rather less after knowing him a bit better.

What took me to Area cmd this morning was 1. To tell Col. L. that Hahr was no use as an officer, & 2. that Ben being in the Army & a v. intelligent person & speaking Russian as a native - he should be used in or around the Russian theatre of war. The Col is going to see what he can do about 1. But in regard to 2. he seemed to rather miss the point. I think that Ben was trying to get on which is ridiculous because he is bound to be a Capt if he stays with me,

7.

& would be very unlikely to become one as an Intelligence officer "somewhere in Russia". But he is obviously an ideal person, his motives are extremely unselfish & patriotic. Personally I should be heartbroken to lose him - because apart from losing a good friend, the one & only person in Palestine whom I like, I should lose a 1st class second i/c - & get the little Jew Arkin instead. What a difference! There is no comparison at all. It is infuriating to be misunderstood on things like this. It took me a long time to make up my mind to offer to make the sacrifice.

I think I must go to bed now & I pray for a letter tomorrow. I am dying for news of you my darling. Three weeks is a long time, when somebody loves somebody else as much as I love you XXX H.

Monday Nov. 10th And there was a letter from you today what a relief my darling & I feel that I have come back to life again & that there is something to live for after all. Just the sight of your handwriting on the envelope has an immediate affect on me. I cheer up & my blood seems to run faster & I feel pleased & happy about everybody & everything. This was no 60 of Sep 1915 & so no 59 has not come in yet & I'm sure that this is the one with more photos of you.

There was also another letter from dear Vera - it is sweet of her to write & she is my most regular