p.

Ferrisburgh 10th Mo. 13th 1861

My [endeared?] Cousin, (Rachel Byrd)

Thy more than welcome, and deeply inter-
esting letter, was duly [received?], and could I have acted in accordance with
the promptings of my heart, it would have been replied to immediately - but
circumstances often oblige me to defer the desired accomplishment of a good
intention, and day after day I hope to do better the next, but the leisure seldom
comes to me now, - for my cares are numerous, and body and mind often very
unfit for the increased burden upon each; - do not accept this, dear cousin,
as a complaint,- but as an apology for any seeming remissness towrds thee
I love - in answering their really valued letters.

I had been hoping for a token of thy remembrance, and felt anxious
to know how you were all faring, - but my chief anxiety had been on dear
Mary's account, as I knew she was more unwell than usual, - when thy
letter came I found there was other cause for anxious feelings, and heart-felt -
sisterly sympathy with thee, my beloved cousin, - for I am sensible how great this
trial of separation from a dear son - from such a cause must be to thee,-
[How?] thy mother's heart will go with him waking and sleeping, and every [nerve?
of Maternal tenderness and solicitude be upon the strain during his
absence; - it will be a sad "waiting and watching",- but Oh May thy Heaven-
ly Father sustain thy spirit through the bitter ordeal, and watch over
and guide the beloved absent one, and bring him back in safety to you.

We have not yet experienced this great trial, tho' the prospects of it
is ever before us, - for our beloved Rowland has felt for many weeks, that he
aught to go with some regiment from this State, - that it was a duty, -
but has deferred on account of our feelings; - we now feel that it is not
our place to insist upon his remaining with us - Much as we desire it,
and have told him so, - whether he will decide to stay or go, is now uncertain.