Herbert Mackarsie journal

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2151_6-1-diary

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of the house the matter was not referred to again, unless in teasing remarks by Frank to his sister.

Life flowed on uneventfully for the Maybrick family through the busy summer days, until the middle of August. One evening husband and wife were sitting on the west porch talking and resting, and looking over their wheat fields, with full ripe grain standing in the shock, waiting to be drawn into the barn on the morrow. Anxiously the farmer looked towards the setting sun for indications of the weather for the following day, and certainly all seemed to promise as be wished. Not a cloud to be seen as Old Sol disappeared in his crimson glory int he West. "Marian, I think the weather will be fine and we can get that field of wheat in tomorrow. I told Frank to get a couple of men from the village to help, he has gone there now. "Yes," replied his wife, "Hester went with him. I was glad for her to get a drive this lovely evening after heat of the day. It will do them both good: but who is this riding so fast?" As she spoke the rider whom she had been watching coming down the road, turned in at their gate, and rode rapidly up the lane. Mr. Maybrick walked out to meet him, recognizing him as a messenger from the nearest railway station. Mrs. Maybrick saw the man take a telegram from his pocket and hand it to her husband. Hurrying forward with a prayer he could open it, which he did with strong hands trembing in spite of himself, and together they read, "Your son Percy is

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dying. Come at once." "Oh, my boy, God help us," sobbed the poor mother, and the father, with face almost as white as her own, and echoing her cry to God for help, put his arm round his wife to support her as they walked into the house. It was she who first roused herself to think what must be done, and to say, "Henry, how soon can we go?" "Not till morning, my poor Marian: there is a train leaving D. (a town twelve miles away) at five in the morning. Frank must drive us there, and if we make good connections I think we can get through and be with Percy the following morning. God only knows whether he will be living, or not, though," he groaned. "Oh, I don't believe God will let our boy die before we have kissed him good-by. Oh, my Percy, my firstborn, God spare him to me," she said, sinking into a chair and covering her face with her hands.

At that moment the sound of wheels was heard, and she started up. "The children, poor things, how will they bear it?" "I will go out and tell them," said her husband, with unusual thought for her; and going out he reached the buggy just as Hester, with a gay laugh at something they had been talking of, took her brother's hand to spring out. In a few words their father told them the sad news, and that he and their mother must go to Percy as quickly as steam could carry them. Hester, struggling to keep her own grief out of sight, flew into the house to her mother, and when the father and brother came in an hour later, after making all arrangements for the early morning's

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drive, mother and daughter seemed to have changed places, and it was Hester who decided what clothing must be taken by the travelers. Hester, who arranged and packed, meantime persuaded her father and mother to lie down and get what rest they might. Then when it came time to rise, this daughter, who seemed to have grown into a woman in one night, dressed the poor grief-striken mother almost as one would a child, and coaxed her to drink a cup of tea and eat a little, lest she should be ill on the journey. "You know, mother," she said, "you must keep up your strength so that you can help to nurse Percy when you get there." During the twelve-mile drive, and through the long day and night on the train, little was said by our travelers, the mother half-stunned by her grief, and ill from the unwonted journey; the father griefstricken, too, for his love for his eldest son was deep and real; but with the thought forcing itself in upon him that he had not done what he ought. He had never felt so helpless as when the terrible message came to him the night before, and with the thought of his helplessness had come the thought of God's power, but that did not bring him comfort; for how, thought he, can I ask God to spare my son, how can I ask any favor from a God that I never acknowledged, that I am not in touch with? Through the long, weary hours on the train this man passed through the bitterest experience of his life. At length they reached the journey's end. A carriage was waiting to convey them to the house where their son

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lay. A servant met them at the door, and in answer to their inquiries said she would bring to them Doctor Allan, who had been with the patient all night. He came, a great friend of their son as they knew from his name, and going straight up to them and taking a hand of each in turn, said, "You are Percy's father and mother. I wish from the bottom of my heart that I could give you good news of him, but I cannot. I do not say that there is no hope; but I can see little. The fever has left him, but he has lain in a sort of stupor nearly all the time for two days. We give him a little nourishment at intervals, but he scarcely rouses even then. Oh, yes; we have had the best advice possible- Dr. W., from the city, a specialist in this disease. We are acting under his orders. The next twenty-four hours will decide it one way or another. You see, he has been working too hard. I warned him often but he always laughed and said, 'Oh. I am all right, Allan; you know I must work hard to catch up again,' meaning, of course, to make up his losses at the time of the fire."

Again there came a pang to the father's heart as he thought of the help he might have given and spared his boy that severe strain. "I think you may look in at him if you are sure you will not make any sound. He will not notice you." Silently they both followed the doctor into the room, gave one look at the dear, white, changed face lying on the pillow, and went out again. After trying to partake of the refreshment provided for them they wandered out, scarcely knowing what

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to do with themselves. They were near Percy, but unable to do one thing for him.

A few rods away from the house where they were they noticed a small church and the people going in to service. They had not realized till then that it was the Sabbath. "Let us go in, Henry," whispered Marian, "we may get some comfort." So they followed the people in, slipping into a seat near the door. The hymns of praise and the prayers fell like balm on the mother's heart, and Mr. Maybrick, too, felt their influence. The young minister rose and gave out his text, reading from the Revised Version, "I will lift up mine eyes unto the mountains, whence cometh my help from the Lord," etc. He spoke first of the feeling of strength, of peace, of security that the mountains give. Then he said they might be taken as a symbol of the great things of God. We are so prone to give all our thought to small things. Our own little petty, every-day tasks, our own possessions (or those we call our own), our own wants and the supplying of them. These things are apt to take all our attention and we spend our time thinking of them, when we might be lifting our eyes to the mountains. We might be thinking that God has other work for us to do than simply to seek for food and raiment. There are those in the world that we can help- we are not "our own" - we are "bought with a price." Therefore we should "glorify God in our bodies and our spirits, which are His." Earnestly the preacher pressed home his point. and over the spirit of Henry Maybrick there

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came a change. He had a vision of God's love, and of his own selfish life, and at the close of the sermon he bowed his head, and prayed that his sins might be forgiven, and that he might be permitted to enter the service of the Lord whose love and mercy he had hitherto slighted. To him was fulfilled the promise, "Him that cometh unto Me I will in no wise cast out," and he went from that church a changed man.

Going back to the house they had left, the nurse who had been waiting on their boy came to them and said, "There is so little change I can hardly call it a change, and yet I believe there is a little for the better. If you will both go and rest now I promise to call you when Dr. W. comes, which will be about midnight." They went, tired out with their journey; but too anxious to sleep, and were up and ready to hear the doctor's verdict when he came from the room. He said, "There is certainly a change for the better. I believe he will pull through." Another day of anxious waiting followed. Another midnight train brought Dr. W. from the city, and his opinion of the previous night was confirmed. Next day the parents were allowed to go to their son's bedside and speak a few words to him. Steadily he gained strength, until they were able to take him home with them, and in three weeks' time it was a happy family party that gathered one evening round the old farm-house table, with the invalid propped in his chair, pale and thin still, but able to reply to the merry jokes of Frank on his lanky appearance, his

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appetite, etc., and Hester ministering to the wants of all, but especially of her mother.

"Marian," said Mr. Maybrick, "is that Thank-offering Meeting over yet?" "No" she replied, with a loving smile, for husband and wife had a new bond between them now, "it is next week, I believe." "Then here is your offering, and yours, Hester," he said, handing each a cheque, on which Hester's delighted eyes read, twenty-five dollars. "Father, do you really mean it?" she cried, throwing her arms about his neck. "I do, my daughter," he replied, "and, God helping me. I mean to be something different to the selfish creature I have been."

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After smoking several cigars turned in.

May 18th At 6 lighted fires and got steam up, weighed asteamed into the Harbor of Monte Video passed the American Frigate Havannah found in port all the Brazilian Squadron, two French Men of war, and the Spanish Schooner. At 8 came to an anchor in the middle of the Fleet: at 9 a French Officer called on board. Commander went on shore. 9.30 Purser went on shore to get necessary money, [?] &c Much disappointed in finding the English Mail had not arrived. In the afternoon went on board the Star who came in about 2 PM and went on shore in the evening with her Surgeon and other Officers to the Club, where we had billiards, cigars &c. At 9 went down to the boat but the Commander not being there had to wait, till our patience was completely tired out, when we again went to the Club, eventually got on board about 12.30 -

May 19th 55. At daylight saw the English Packet coming in, turned out as soon as I heard it reported and by 8 I had letters from L, Mother, Bill, Eversfield and Sir Wm Burnett : reading letters and papers all afternoon : increase of pay 1/per diem - At 11 went on board Star, heard that we were to sail for Rio de Janeiro on the 25th Sailed two Brazilian Men of War Steamers - Gunner on shore entering men for service. In the afternoon Commander and Purser went ashore to billiards. At 5 Camilla sailed for Buenos Ayres. P Morgan and Akaster came on board, had a quiet game at Cribbage, pipe, and having made Saturday night before they left, turned in.

Sunday May 20th 1855. Very cold with a fresh breeze blowing. At 9.30 went to Divisions and performed Divine Service : Arrived the Menai from Buenos Aires and two Brazilian Men of War. At noon Commdr called on board the French Senior Officer. An invitation for all of us to go to the Ojura, declined, all the rest going - Answered L's letter preparatory to leaving for Rio, at the English Mail would have left previous to our arrival there, resolving to have my letter with the Star. In the

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raining I went on board the Star, had tea and returned at 7.30 with her Master: found all my messmates had gone to the theatre. After smoking sundry pipes Akaster went on board -

May 21st After breakfast sent cutter on shore for bread - Star refitting: sailed a Brazy Steamer. Made out descriptions of Machell offering a reward of £23. At 1 Captain Seward of the Star came on board : every appearance of a Pampers - The Menai left for Buenos Ayres: in the evening heavy rain - Three of the Stars came on board and played at Vingturo-

May 22nd Raining all night. At 8 it cleared up. Purser came on board. At 11 Commander came off in a very bad temper. Received an order from Captn Seward to dress ship on Thursday, being the anniversity of Her Majesty's Birthday - Wind very cold with a heavy week from SGe: 12.30 sent pinnace on shore for Bread. In afternoon blowing very hard, all communication with shore gone - I gave her more cable

May 23rd Still blowing fresh, shorned in chain, loosed sails to dry, prepared for going to sea - orders from Captn Seward to muster on Thursday in Cocked Lots In the evening went on board the Star returning at 10 Other officers came off about twelve.

May 24th At 7 commenced to dress ship in commemoration of the anniversary of Her Majesty's Birthday & hoisted the flags and Ensigns, all the Foreign Men of boat doing the same - at noon the French Commander firing a salute the American Spanish and Brazilian following. Letter bag closed sent one (large) to [Lossy?] and one to S.MB. In the afternoon went on shore to settle Mess Bills - at 8 Two of the Stars came on board. -

May 25th At daylight have short. at 7 weighed and made sail: the coldest morning we have yet had : At Stirsails - At 9 shortened sail, and braced up - Went to General Quarters. Passed a large Trench

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May 31st At 5 Sighted fires and got steam up. At 7 weighed and steamed towards the Bar 7.30 made our Pendants to HMS Express : saw a small steamer towing out a vessel. At 9 Stopped alongside and Commander went on board Express - returned in half an hour and ordered us to anchor and draw the fires : he then went on board the small steamer, came back and took the second gig, with two days provisions &c and took a passage in Steamer up to Rio Grande do Sul, distant about 15 miles, (as there was not sufficient water on the bar for us to go over) to wait on Captain Boyce of Express, Purser went with him. Sailed a small brig for England. One of the Officers of Express came on board. At 3 PM saw a tug coming off having in tow two gigs which we soon made out to be our own and the Express's : Captn Boyce & Christian went on board with the Brazilian Consul when a Salute of seven guns was fired : at 5 Consul left when another salute was fired: 5.15 a signal from Express to shorten in cable and prepare for sea : at 6 Consul & Purser came on board up gig, weighed and made sail in Co with Express, arrived an American Brig. Having got our anchor at the bows after making sail the Compressor tackle fell carried away and away went anchor and cable again at a frightful rate, very nearly losing both : the Brig seeing it just about and stood towards us: almost out of sight astern -

Friday, June 1st 1855 At Sea. At 2 blowing fresh, single reefed fore topsail and furled [FGb?] sail. At 8 saw Express bearing WNW dist 7 or 8 miles - 9 made sail - a signal on board Express but could not make it out : a nasty cross sea running many of our people sea sick. At noon the weather began to look overall, and the barometer fell fast - Lost sight of Express on our weather quarter - At 7 single reefed the fore and aft sails, secured the guns, rose frontier braces, and hoisted the boats in -

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October 7th Cold but very healthy, but with a fresh breeze blowing from NE. Our miss gradually going to the devil. Gave leave to part of the Ships Company. In the evening calm and fine.

October 8th Fine weather; three of our men ashore, descriptions were made out: heard of our old Capts mate having been drunk, falling and hurting his head. After dinner went on shore to pay some small bills, came off at sunset, and fell overboard and was glad to have a glass of hot rum & water with a pipe and turn in.

October 9th Felt rather unwell from my submersion my right arm being a little hurt when I fell, but as the only cap I had to my name came off, I had a short swim for it with a frock coat on, picked it up, got into the boat and from here on board. At 9.30 went to General Quarters going through the old game again. In the evening most of the Officers went to the Opera, and I went to bed early.

October 10th A fresh breeze blowing. Christian went away in the cutter with some friends on a shooting expedition returning in the evening, with poor sport.

October 11th Had a slight touch of Ague, but got better by noon. In the evening there was a quarrel between some Spaniards and Americans, in which one of the latter was killed and many severely wounded.

Sunday October 12th Monte Video. At the usual time went to Divisions and performed Divine Service on the upper deck where it was very cold, altho' a fine day. Some of the Officers afterwards went ashore to Church. At noon there was any quantity of Saluting, among the French

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Wednesday June 20th 1855 - Being the anniversary of the Accession of our Queen, the ship was dressed and a general holiday made - Red Jacket sailed for England At noon Flag Ship Madagascar fired a Royal Salute, the French, American and Brazilian returning it, and at the same time, giving three cheers. At 3 the Vixen came over and went up to the Coal Wharf preparatory to going home. In the evening there was a grand display of fireworks on shore.

June 21st Very unwell, suffering from headache: Surgeon of Flag Ship came on board to see me - Spy came in from the [Neoarch?] having Yellow Fever on board, 10 fatal cases: put in Quarantine. In the evening most of the Officers went on shore to the Opera - At 8 a heavy shower of rain.

June 22nd - Exercised at General Quarters - Heard of another death on board the Spy. In the afternoon Drs Byrne and Woodcock came on board and shortly afterwards Dr Crocker and Eversfield - Heard from them that we are all to go out on a cruise with the Admiral on the 28th, after which the Vixen was to sail for England - Spy has sent several of her hands to the Hospital but was relieved from Quarantine - Took a dose of Calomel and Opium and turned in.

June 23rd At 8 the Vixen came down from the Coal Wharf and anchored close to us. Heard of the arrival of the Lindersforne from Liverpool - Felt a little better and able to attend to the Sick without assistance from Flag Ship. 10 Pridham went on shore to endeavour to enter men being now thirteen short of complement with the prospect of invaliding two or three more - Came off in the evening bringing with him four men; made it Saturday night in

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Frigate standing to the Mount - In the evening shortned sail

May 26th Made and shortned sail at requisite braking to the Eastward in bed all day from a Flue and sore throat : got up in the evening had my bed make drank a tumbler of hot brandy and water with a fid of butter in it: by the bye the latter did not improve it and again turned in.

Sunday 27th 1855 - At sea, passed a very restless night, and as the weather was very raw and cold I kept my cabin - 9.30 went to Division and had Divine Service - In the evening the breeze freshened and we shortned sail, took some medicine, and after commencing a letter to L which I was obliged to leave off on account of my eye, went to bed.

May 28th At daylight after a restless night woke with my eye quite closed up, and also a severe attack of Mumps - At 1 a breeze sprang up from the SEward, made sail and kept her away her course - A large discharge from my eye giving me much relief. By seven we were going along nearly eight knots.

May 29th A most beautiful morning, with a very light air of some - Said fires preparatory for steaming - At 8 a light breeze from the NWard, braced sharp up on the starboard tack. At 11.30 paid monthly allowance money to Ships Company. In the afternoon the breeze freshened. 9 PM went to Night Quarters, firing three rounds.

May 30th At 3 tacked, sounded in 37 fths. At 9 tacked standing in towards the land. In the afternoon breeze freshened tacked as requisite. At 6 a fresh breeze laying her course. At 8 saw the Sight, at 12 anchored in 10 fths, veered to 4 shackles of chain and furled sails.

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