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New York April 12th 1899
I am really rejoiced, my dear Margaret, that you have an excuse for not writing to me sooner. I bore your silence with much impatience, I thought I deserved better [usage ?].
So, Margaret, after you are married I must not entrust my secrets to your care. I cannot coincide with you in the opinion that the most illimitable confidence ought to exist between those whom the bands of matrimony have united. As to what relates entirely to themselves, the confidence ought, perhaps, to be boundless, but the secret of a friend should ever be most sacredly preserved, they are a property which should be inalienable [and ?] no consideration whatever should induce us to reveal them. But if the performance of this duty by accompanied by difficulty [?] [?], then indeed, we ought not to accept the confidence of a friend but candidly own the reason of our refusal. Surely this is not necessary. To me it would be a sacrifice of some of my [dearest ?] pleasures. I know nothing more heart-soothing, more delightful, more capable of heightening affection, than being trusted with the concerns of a friend, to alleviate her cares, by sympathy, and perhaps to [?] her, by advice. We marriage to annihilate such communications, it would indeed be the death of friendship. The espousals of a friend, instead of being witnessed by joy, would induce the same emotion we should have felt at her funeral. That being [?] be unpardonably selfish , who would wish to
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deprive her, whom he loved, of every gratification, however valued, which did not proceed directly from himself. Yet, much depends on disposition, if we have been in the habit of imparting every idea, that which has powerfully [impressed ?] the mind and which frequently employs the thought, will be perpetually in danger of escaping from the lips, in the moments of unguarded converse. And though constant watchfulness may enable us to pressure our thirst, yet the desire of concealment will be too evident to remain unobserved, and this unaccustomed reserve, may awaken suspicion, that irreconcilable enemy to enjoyment. This could not be the case with me. Were I to remark any such unreasonable expectations I would express them immediately. "Beware of underlying immoderate wishes, if you are desirous of knowing any thing that respects myself, you shall be gratified, but what relates to my friend, shall be forever confined to my own bosom.
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will be extremely gratifying to me. I would not say flattering, for what has flattery to do with friendship. Believe me, Margaret, you may place the firmest reliance upon my fidelity. I am most certain, nothing could tempt me, to an indiscreet disclosure. Your letters are the least confidential of any I receive. Is this well Margaret? I do think if Mr Smith were my correspondent, he would do better. Several times I have thought of complaining to him of your unfriendliness.
I was quite delighted by my success in drawing the charachter of Mr Smith. Woud you not have imagined I was a profit of [Acoull?] had you known that I was entirely ignorant of the art of judging the character from the handwriting? The postscript was exactly calculated to please me. I instantly conjectured who the author was, but did not mention my suspicions, because, I thought, I could [write?] with more freedom to one who was anonymous. You cannot imagine how much entertainment it afforded me nor with what delight I answered it. I should have been pretty disappointed had you not shewn it to him, for it was written purposely for his perusal.
This letter has the same fault with yours, there is very little about myself in it, it is almost too late to apply a remedy now. Nothing of moment has occurred to me. My life glide on, in the same uninterrupted state of tranquility, every week as uniform as the last. I am not as gay as in days of yore, but have almost regained my former cheerfulness. I am happy to hear your time has flown on such downy pinions: may years elapse before you pass another winter in Philada How is this, my friend? Still repeating the old story, you will say— Do not therefore disregard it, it has a powerful claim to my attention, it relates to the happiness of myfriend. Mama did not mention a word about Sister Jane in her last letter. Do, Margaret be particular, remember
