James Adam diary: 1857-1863 (Ms. Codex 1948)

Southampton

called on me. We called in a Druggists named Bartlett, a friend of his (& quite a character too) from whom I got a few medicines I had neglected to take with me. Mr Sirius (James Forbes's friend) came down to the quay with me & saw me off. Smith, Barry's Clerk came along with me as far as the "Candia" which was laying 2 miles down the river. A great crowd had collected on the quay to see us off, being quite a military time out on board. they gave us three cheers as we turned off & steamed down the river We came in view of the Candia & a fine looking vessel it is only lying rather low in the water this is owing to the heavy stock on board as they do not intend to stop at the Cape if it can be avoided. We got on board every is beautifully fitted up the Saloon is very handsome I should think 80 feet long & 18 broad very handsomely fitted up we stayed about 2 hours before setting sail the steamer which had

on bd. S.S. "Candia" off Southampton

brought us on board left giving us three cheers & waving of hats & hankerchiefs. Another steamer came out filled with passengers to have a look at us before sailing there were a great many ladies on board it. Some of then doubtless had friends on board as I saw more than one eye wet with tears. After this steamer left we got up steam & off we went gallantly down the river. The water was very smooth & we had a fine view of the country on each side going- How well I could have enjoyed that scene had you all been in the ship beside me but the idea that I was leaving the shores of Great Britain & with them all that was nearest & dearest to me on earth had nearly overcome me there was such a dull heavy weight at my heart that I could not take delight or interest in anything If before leaving a had had a word from home to tell me you were all well & happy with what a lightened heart I could have proceeded on the voyage

on bd. S.S. "Candia"

I wonder that Fred did not write me either he who has been the best kindred & truest friend ever I had next to my own family How anxiously did I look over the letters to see if there was one for me but I was doomed to be disappointed. I daresay you would not think I would sail so soon & then you had had no letter from me. 2 or 3 long months will pass away or it may be longer before I can expect to hear a word from home the thought of that makes me most miserable & sad. How often do I ask myself the question How are all at home has my mother become at all reconciled to my absence. Oh how often I now tax myself with neglect to my mother. how often have I greived & vexed her who has always been so kind to me what self denial & patient endurance has she undergone for our sakes & in what a Sorry way I have repaid them. Sometimes when I think I shall never see that face again which I have loved so well I am almost mad with the thought. But I will put my hurt in one all seeing providence who

directs everything for the best My prayer will always be that we may be long spared & that we may one day meet again. This hope will make me [stive] strive with the help & blessing of God to perservere through every difficulty that I may one day be enabled to repay in some measure all your kindness to me. I remained on deck until the bell sounded for dinner 4 oclock the sea was beautifully calm the sun shone brightly + we were gradually losing sight of land I wrote a letter which I gave to the pilot to take on shore with him he left us when we had cleared the needles. The Victuallis department is most handsomely attended to in this ship, the dinner today was fit for a prince. We had soup fish, roast beef & mutton covd dishes fruit, bread cheese - lettuce nuts with a plentiful allowance of wine of all kinds Sherry port Claret Madeira Champagne Hock plenty ale & porter, in fact I wonder how the P & O

Comp: can supply it at the rates which they charge for passage, but I believe they have everything duty free which accounts at any rate for the liberal supply of wine. When I went on deck again I found that we had cleared the Needles & were gradually losing sight of the white cliffs of England. Farewell to old England then when will I again behold your lovely shores. I remained on deck till 8 oclock every one here are strangers to me. there are 6 or 8 officers of the 34th the regiment that was in the Castle before I left on board. their faces are familiar as I used to see them often marching to the park. At 8 oclock there was tea. About 9 I turned into my berth I have got a very good berth the Cabin is occupied by three of us. Capt. Tedlie of the 50th Royal rifles Capt Hallowes of the Irish Fusiliers & myself. It is a very nice little Cabin well fitted up. We have a Servant or steward to wait on us appointed by the ship, the others also engaged him to wait at dinner & I did so likewise