3 - Spring 1904

answered the other. "Comical, but by Jove I believe I'm sick already" said the fat man. "Funny what made you sick so soon, Can't be anything you've eaten." The fat man's condition however led them to prepare instantly for bed. But here another controversy arose. The other fellow wanted the fat man to take the upper berth but the fat man said he couldn't and he daren't. The other fellow insisted that it would be more comfortable but the fat man objected that it didn't look very strong. The dispute was at last settled by the other fellow consenting to take the upper berth saying as he did so, "Now blast me if everk I call you 'Sunny Joe' again!"

The RivALs When Sheridan "The Rivals" wrote He doubtless saw afar, But little dreamed of characters Each one Western star.

Poetic story I will tell Of play at Varsity Where student actors represent Dramatis Personae

Let shade of Sheridan arise And hear of how they play And thou, O Muse, awake my thoughts Assist me to portray

In language true to look and deed Of each upon the stage, From dear "old Grant" with pow[d]ered hair To him of youthful age.

Sir Absolute "Old Grant" appeared With a supply of stout, And while his nose bloomed visibly, He kept his head throughout [Image - drawing of person's head with large top hat and bubble from mouth saying "Hey! Mrs. Malaprop"] [Image] - drawing of a wine glass half full of dark liquid]

Cornish as Captain Absolute Revealed his "heavenly eyes" Peering around the door to hear His Pa soliloquize. [Image - part of a door with a man's head peering out from behind it]

Shore acted well with Julia near To touch his heart and brain, And when the play was finished out, He wished to try again. [Image - two hearts with an arrow through both of them]

Westgate as Acres showed his art Without a lapse or cough, But something must have touched his cheek And rubbed his whisker off. [Image - man's head]

In soldier blue, Sir Lucius came With Joseph's happy smile And he the osculation act Performed in perfect style [Image - head of man with flat hat on facing head of woman with a brimmed hat tied under her chin]

And yet his nerve was sorely tried His brogue had varied sound - A lapsus linguae possibly - When people looked around. [Image - head and shoulders of a man facing a woman with a brimmed hat tied under her chin]

McBoun with faithfulness performed, As Fag was ever true, Determined when occasion rose, To see his master through.

Cosy as David nimbly walked In velvet coat of green, Of honor and of valor talked Throughout the duel scene. [Image - a man wearing a flat hat on his head, hip length coat, shirt and tie, knee length pants and dark shoes]

Me thinks that Acres' missing beard Was due to Cosy's clutch, Though painted beard might disappear By tender maiden's touch.

Hughes surely is a bashful man As Thomas seemed most shy But this will be amended much As college years go by

Miss Rowat acted Malaprop In dress of modest gray But flowers, diamonds, chain and fan Made quite a grand display [Image - head and shoulders drawing of a woman with a brimmed hat tied under her chin]

Twas little wonder that she felt So fully "analyzed" Yet in the end she won herself A husband whom she prized.