Letter from Harry Massey to Barbara Massey

No. 19. Thursday - 25th June.

Major J.H. Massey. 6. Palestinian Coy. The Buffs M.E.F.

My darling sweetheart.

I had two p.cs. from you on Monday - May 31 & June 8~, which was quite quick. But no letters for more than three weeks now, & so I am thirsting for news. In your first p.c. you ask me what is this Insurance Policy called "May" for which you keep getting receipts, & you ask me am I avoiding the question & you say it looks suspicious.

You have not asked the question before, & so I am not evading it. And really, my puss, I have not the faintest idea as to what it is. And are you suspicious of me - or the receipts - or what. The only Insurance policies we have are paid by Bankers Draft - Canada Life [illegible]2-3-4. & Ocean Accident & Guarantee [illegible]8-1-8 - both of which are paid every 3 months. & they appear on the Bank statement. So ask me another one, darling. You had better write to wherever the receipts came from & ask them what it is all about.

And now it is after dinner. & I have left my pen in the office. so you must forgive a patchwork letter.

Well, our move was completed on Monday. & here I am back in the old town. & not feeling very excited about it. Our duties are much the same as last year. though not so many of them. & I personally have far & away fewer responsibilities. on account of not being in charge of that horrible barracks. The camp we are in is not too bad, as camps go - we all sleep in tents, but offices & administrative buildings & messes are in the usual tin & concrete huts. Toby & I have a large tent to ourselves, about the same size as our bedroom at [Moorfield?] Cottage, & the same tent in which 12 men have to sleep; this hardly seems fair, but there are no smaller ones available. & I have to sleep alone. There is another Coy in the same camp. & they have been here for some time already; their C.O. is actually a few days

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junior to me! but I am not going to push my claims. & am leaving him in charge - as I hope to be away from here in 3-[illegible] weeks time. Col. L. called in today, on his way down from Syria. & told me that he had now put my name forward. but had no idea as to what would happen; this is about the C.R.O. job of course.

I am by now absolutely busting to get away from this job. & to get on with the new one. I am completely browned off with this job - There is so little scope for energy & [imaginarian?] & doing things. I just feel myself becoming more & more dead dull & [illegible] & that only real feelings I [illegible] are aggravation & impatience & an awful sense of frustration. And my last spark of hope is going out about posting home - & that makes me all the more anxious for a change & for some hard & useful work. instead of this dull routine stuff what [illegible] me down & somehow takes up enough of my time to prevent me writing or reading much. And I am already beginning to fill up with ideas for the CRO job & am wanting to get at it & put them into practice. I really am beginning to feel that unless I can get down to some real job. which will about my interest & demand something from me. I shall degenerate or else become entirely lifeless. As you must know from my letters. I'm afraid, & as you, poor darling can understand so well. I have had some pretty flat patches before. But my present one is [illegible] all records for length of time & for flatness. I think, perhaps, that the return to Hafa has something to do with it. Even though I like th

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place so much better than Lydda. & though it must surely be the best place in Palestine the very last of [illegible] to it after 9 1/2 months away: & doing roughly the same duties again. give me an awful feeling of having gone around in a circle & taken nearly a year to do it, & still I am apparently no nearer to being together with you again. And the work I am doing has so little direct influence on the war & the hastening of the end. And the war news is so bad - from Libya especially. Your p.c. of June 8 expects that my spirits are much better about the war read as you say, & less of [illegible]. withdrawal into Egypt - where we were when I arrived her in Nov 40. Its not inspiring or cheering is it? Two weeks ago the Palestinian [illegible] was actually leering at Gen. Rommel for having to fly [illegible] dash about the front to exhort & cheer up his troops. We dont have to do that [illegible] said - Gen [illegible] that he [illegible] well in hand & can look on [illegible] his pipe. [illegible] but how bloody is our propaganda & news service. [illegible] unique that [illegible] were to change Generals. we might also change the result. I was looking at a photograph of Ritchie the other day though I may be misjudging the man. he appears to me to [illegible] the awful [illegible] bred [illegible] faced expression [illegible] too little [illegible] too much of [illegible] feel that we [illegible] an awful [illegible] vis-a-vis the Germans - they & their generals have been [illegible] for year for war. & we treat it as a game of [illegible] officers have been mainly interested in anything but war. But I hope that the news will be better by the

Sunday. June 28th.

My darling own darling. I have sent you a cable & an A.G. - but I can still hardly believe that it is true. On Thursday when I was writing I was in pretty low spirits. And on Friday evening, I was even lower, because I had met another officer who was being posted home, & his reasons seemed to be much less serious than ours.

And then yesterday morning it happened - I had been down for a [bathe?] before breakfast. & just as I got back to camp I was called to the telephone. & told this wonderful, amazing news. I have been in a complete flat spin ever since. You can hardly imagine how I feel. Instead of this endless misery of not being with you, & no apparent end to it - I am now leaving here on Thursday, the next that ever is, & commencing my journey home to you, my darling, & to Maxie.

Just when I shall arrive, goodness only know knows, but I go first to the I.B.D & hope to leave there soon & embark for home. And I imagine arriving in England - or Scotland - about the middle

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of September. If it is later, or even much later, you must not worry darling. There may be a longish stop in S. Africa, & it may be a slow convoy.

But this is the most wonderful thing that ever happened. & I can still hardly believe it.

Oh darling, it seems that there is some justice left in the world, & even in the Army, & we are being repaid for our sorrows, & for our constant love for each other.

I am frantically busy packing up & getting the Coy's & my affairs in order - & saying goodbye & arranging for more good byes. And I must admit that I have now lost interest in writing to you. I shall probably send you another A.G. from the I.B.D. & I shall certainly cable you again when I am on the point of leaving; & I hope, send you a cable from Durban or Capetown or somewhere. But writing letters is now unrealistic. I am coming home to you - & I may arrive before this letter. And you know I love & adore & worship you. & have done ever since I met