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that I won't be able to let my feelings out) I cant figure out what
happening to me and to our love and yet I know things are happening
In some ways its much deeper and surer for me now (this is the main
feeling I think. I feel older especially in this group I guess- and more
mature and ready for such a step as marriage.) But beyond this deep
sureness and calmness that it real I feel things changing. I guess
its that some of the "innocence" the feeling that this is the first such
love the world has ever seen the "madness" of it is fading as the
permanence of it and the patience and frustration of it grows. The clement
that's lacking in the maturity feeling is that of learning to live with each
other to think and feel in consideration of each other; time will have
to take care of that and in some ways our letters do help. Gosh but
the foregoing looks vague as I read it but some how I just couldn't
go on [blything?] saying "I love you" is as many cleave ways as possible
without trying to find the meaning in it for us. For I dont
eve want the worlds to become tuite (or feel tuite as I write them)
and to prevent this I have to think . about this sort of thing
as well as try to capture the feelings which the words contain.
Still vague but I'll keep trying and you should too darling. Try
to set down very honestly what you feel and think about us so
that we can understand each other better for this is really
to love each other more. And that is the find truth- that I love
you more richly deeply maturely surely with each day.
I might my dearest read this one again and again and I hope
it makes some sense.
I love you,
George
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