Diaries: 1945 March 11-1945 June 20; 1945 June 25-1945 November 5; Loose material from diaries

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March 19, Monday A diphteria [sic] patient coughed into my face yesterday and since the evening I feel hoarse and slept badly. This is the danger of our reduced resistance.

Apu Sebes is called to Debrecen, where the government is at present. I suppose, he will be very useful there, being the perfect administrator. He had from the other side the news, Rundstädt, as the commander in chief of the Western German army, had asked for armistice from the U.S and Great Britain with the well known „save the European culture” stuff. He was told even small units may go over to the allies, but separate armistice is possible for one frontline only –Mr. Láng has the news from the Russians, that the new German offensive East the Balaton is already crushed and encircled forces liquidated. This morning very intensive airactivity is going over us, Westwards. No other war noises. I feel calm, I hope war will not reach us any more.

It is a year today, the German army and nazi system invaded us entirely. It was a terrible year, though one could see clearly, it can have but one ending. May be, it would be easier to support all, could we see the end, during the last days and last hour of the siege (when our houses and flats were made into ruins because every window was made a German machine gun [strikethrough] stand [/strikethrough] nest) the German soldiers sobbed hysterically in the shelters, before the surviving inhabitants: all is lost! We are lost! Now, tell me [strikethrough] quite [/strikethrough] with impartiality, what can one expect from a people which believed the nazi propaganda stuff until

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the last hour and felt deceived only when the Russian forces were in the next vicinity? They as a mass, are not able of forming their own judgement and therefore most dangerous in the future. It is not because of hate, they have to be destroyed or made impossible, but because they will swallow any propaganda any time in future.

The afternoon. Comparatively, a quiet Monday, from the medical point of view. Some work in the morning, a mother and child patient here the afternoon, nothing special. An interesting consequence of living for long weeks in the shelter (some lived there for nine weeks), the menstrual periods are disturbed, there are many, who did not have their menses since December, without the possibility of pregnancy.

[Hungarian] Egyszer régen írtam arról, hogy úgy látszik kezdődik nálam a klimaktérium. Hát igen lassan, sőt alig. Le fogom írni, hány naponként jelentkezett azóta a menszeszem, mindig kezdőnaptól kezdőnapig számítva. Miattad fontos, hogy tudd, milyen a családi típus. Az a bizonyos eset volt 1942 októberében or novemberében 55 napra jött utánna az első menszesz. Ezután 23, 23, 25, 27, 23, 25, 22, 23,27, 15, 25, 23, 26, 23, 21, 23, 26, 22, 22, 59, 31, 21, 24, 24, 13, 17, 24, 21, 20, 23, 21, 24, 33 nap volt az időköz mostanáig. Nemsokára 47 éves leszek. [Hungarian]

Antisemites stated during the nyilas government, that in case of Russian occupation, Jews will take a terrible revenge on all gentiles. Nothing of the sort. Sure, many Jews are working with the GPU, several of them I met on the streets, but as a rule, I did not hear any anti-gentile or anti-christian word, I am told, the Russians

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here are furious with our Jews, they counted upon them, they will collaborate with the GPU in their search after nazi and nyilas. Jews, on the other hand, do nothing of the sort and go after their own business. Besides the Jews it were the Swedes, the Russians were mad [strikethrough] about [/strikethrough] at and sent all the legation out of the country. [strikethrough] Second [/strikethrough] According to them they collaborated with the nyilas.

March 20, Tuesday The night distant cannonade could be heard, after several weeks respite. I am not nervous though, the forces, the Russians sent over to the Buda side are tremendous (second the Benda boys, who have seen it at the Budafoki bridge) and air activity since yesterday morning almost continuous. I hope, this time the Germans will be driven back finally. It is a normal, spring weather (you hear normal!, Geo darling) little mud, roads dried up, clear skies everything favourable for the big spring offensive. I am only sorry for the people, especially friends and relatives, your aunt Margit, uncle Rudi, the Gyetvays, etc. on the [strikethrough] Eastern [/strikethrough] Western parts of the country. It is so nice to be over with all these dangers, cruelties, discomforts and hope for the return of normal conditions. It is not yet so nice, as I have imagined ahead, just to be dropped on the other side of the globe- it would be, if we had postal connection.

Mr Fledderus though, Dutch consul here, states that a part of the mixed American-British commission has really arrived to Pest and are residing at Semmelweiss utca. His son went over to Pest to get

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into contact with them. So, through Elly I shall have more detailed news about them.

All the time allied aircraft is over us in strength. I loved to hear and see [strikethrough] of [/strikethrough] them even, when we have been the target. How much nicer it is now! Stimulating, cheerful.

The afternoon. There are rumours, that a member of the mixed commission at Debrecen was killed and one wounded by R. soldiers, looting on the wrong place. [strikethrough] They resisted to the looting soldiers and so it happened, allegedly [/strikethrough] The men of the mixed commission protested, or their government protested and [strikethrough] therefore [/strikethrough] they are here now [strikethrough] at [/strikethrough] in Bpest, to have an eye on, what is going on with civilian population.

March 21, Wednesday Yesterday, the afternoon Elko and Klári have been here. They still hope to get over to Pest, Elko bound for Halas and Klári, allegedly called to work with the National Relief. [strikethrough] I told them, it is doubtful, the nation will be elieved, but [/strikethrough] She will have her living out of it. Elko who has his doubts, how his Halas presbitery [presbytery] will [strikethrough] take [/strikethrough] look at his [strikethrough] taking refuge [/strikethrough] running away works to be sent out to the U.S, on the other hand he has hoped to be asked of the editor in chief of Pesti Hírlap, which would be the leading protestant paper in the future. Klári is disillusioned about being liberated, their friends lost their illusions in commission with them, as they left the house of the Jávors, given [strikethrough] under [/strikethrough] into their care and lost all valuables, they were trusted with. Among others he lost a bianco [sic] cheque of yours, which is a serious menace on your money, Dear forgive

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me! I told him, the first opportunity he has, with help of a member of the joint commission, he has to cable you to cancel the payments of your cheques. It could have happened with your cheque still in my bag, but it is so characteristic of him, taking refuge the first opportune moment and not caring a bit for other people’s interests. The pillage happened at the International Red Cross house at Fillér utca.

Something ought to be true about yesterday mentioned American-British-Russian discord, as in last Sunday’s paper I read an announcement of the Swiss legation, as protecting power for American interests, that no American or allied flags may be used for decoration of houses, neither by individual persons, mostly institutions or corporation.

Food begins to [strikethrough] drop in [/strikethrough] trickle slowly into Buda. Black market is flourishing, of course. Russian soldiers took a lot of flour with [strikethrough] lorries [/strikethrough] trucks yesterday here, Marianne Halasy bought on the street bread flour for 70 and white flour for 90 Ps, our commissioners for the house brought with the Russians three sacks of flour too ( so he could not buy it on a higher price), but he, the darling, sells it for 150 Ps per kg. I bought from Klári’s friend one kg of white flour this morning for 120 P, but I got about one kg of bread flour as present from Klári so in the whole, I bought cheaply. –We did not pay a rent since December. Now they want to have it for three months, I do not see how people will have the money as there was no salaries since December.