p.

4.

with all of my body & soul. I think about you so
much - & I am just working & writing & reading &
waiting for the day when our life can begin again.
I salute you & kiss you, my beautiful Barbar, on every
available inch of your adorable body, please.
You are a wonder, my darling - & I long for & picture
you & I, walking through London holding hands -
having a drink somewhere & talking to eachother -
& then being somewhere were we can make
love & be together.

But I must write about something else - though I
am glad I have written about this, & I hope you
are not sorry. Will you tell me? But I have
been feeling so wooden & sexless these last weeks,
& tonight I feel very much of flesh & blood.

I seem to have been writing rather a lot recently
about our life after the war. From the points of view
of the Assn & our probable political activities - but
I have said nothing about your main interest of
art. There is really not very much that I can say
as things are so uncertain & all discussion is so
theoretical. But I do not want you to think that
I am only thinking of myself because that is not
true. It is, I suppose, fairly obvious that in the first place
I return to the Assn & I suppose that will mean
to Wm. North & Co. [?] - having first of all wrung
out of Peter as long a holiday as possible. And
then we shall have to begin to think.

Wednesday, 29th Apr. I stopped last night because I wanted
to go to bed - & also because it was difficult to go on -
& also because if I do go on, I want to go on carefully