Diary

Getting it now keeps me going, unlike Paul who has pooped out.

And I never have really done anything very original. I've copied Basic, managed Cobol, did design enhancements on Sort.

{But never anything original. TRUE {And I'm terrible at mkg. TRY TO {And I'm awful with people in general. CHANGE. {Not very imaginative.

SO I CAN'T TAKE ANY CREDIT FOR CREATING MICROSOFT. I HELPED START IT FROM APR '76 THRU JUNE '77, BUT I HAVE HAD ONLY MUCH MORE SPECIFIC DUTIES SINCE.

I'M NOT HOT. REMEMBER THAT.

AND DON'T EVER LEAD ANYONE ON TO THINK THAT I AM OWNER OR FOUNDER.

WHEN MICROSOFT GOES PUBLIC, THE NEWS WILL BE OUT...

I'M DOING WELL, BUT THERE'S NO POINT IN TRYING TO GET RICH. I CAN'T MANAGE PEOPLE. I CAN'T RUN A BUSINESS. JUST GET ENOUGH FOR ME.

I should be able to get token 8%/year raise. So I want $80k/year. But big demand will be options. I want a bigger piece of the action. If I can't have it, then I'll be depressed. [noted to right] TOUGH: 11/17 [/note]

But I don't need more $$. It's better to go for more stocks.

But what I really want now is time to myself. [noted above] YES, OUI, SI!! 11/17 [/note] I've done a very good PC product. Now enjoy the fruits of my labor for 3 months.

If they want home finance then I want 60k stock options in 4 years!

I MAY NOT BE HOT SOCIALLY, BUT I CREATE NEW PRODUCTS! AND I AM UNIQUE FOR PF, SO DON'T FORGET THAT. YOU DON'T WANT TO FEEL SOLD SHORT, FOR LESS.

GO FOR BIG $$ + WORK DOWN.

I need a level of income that I'll be happy with for next 2 years. Will I be happy here for next 2 years?

I'm considering tactics too much.

What I really need to decide is what I want, and that takes time. Use up my vacation. It's that time of year. And explore the market.

But the facts are a) I have nowhere to go b) I am dissatisfied thinking I am making as much now as I did when I started to work here. I am better now by far, by more than is covered by $80K. The difference should be in stock!

NOTHING { I am valuable to Microsoft. NEW { I am reliable. 11/17 { They have investment in me. WRONG { I don't mind leaving, even if I do have nowhere to go.

So what would the loss be? $68K a year, and a cushy environment, but I could gain the sun. Or MEN for friends. + MUSIC

THE FACT ALSO IS:

I SHOULD BARGAIN AS IF I HAD TO BE HERE WITHOUT BOB. IF I START ON THIS, I MAY NOT LIKE LIVING HERE THROUGH ITS COMPLETION!! [noted above] FORGET SEX FOR 3 or 4 months: 11/17 [/note]

DEFINITELY GO FOR [missing word? ] ON THE STOCK OPTIONS! [note] HOW? 11/17 [/note]

IS IT REALLY WORTH GETTING ALL THAT MONEY JUST TO SEE MY YOUTH PASS AWAY! [prior sentence crossed out with note] SEATTLE HAS BEEN GREAT FUN SINCE JUNE 11/17 [/note] MAKE MONEY WHEN I'M OLDER. HAVE FUN NOW. GET TO KNOW PEOPLE NOW. ______________________________________________________________________ THURSDAY, OCT 20

Start to work on PF accounts. Call Aamco at 9:15. Go there for estimate. Then home for jacket + drop out karass tapes. Then go to buy Halloween stuff and drop off car. Eat lunch, go to gym, bus home, pickup video, j.o. w/ Bruno + Josh.

3:15 back to accounts... worked all evening out w/ Bob at 11:30 Home together + watch Bruno + Josh.

FRIDAY, OCT 21

Accounts all day until 7:30 when Chuck Pichke comes to help me lay out int design. 10 - Rick Ulrich arrives. Coke. Visit Chayka. Bob arrives. Go for drinks at Park Bench. Too tired for Neighbors. Walk home in rain. What a WASTED evening. ________________________________________________________________________ SATURDAY, OCT 22

All day on accounts again, except to watch Best Little Whorehouse on video, especially locker room scene. Return them + go to gym 6-7:00. Dick's burger for dinner.

Talk with Mom + Dad on phone about their wonderful vacation

Drag myself out to Axelrock (twilight zone) Crass Distraction + Neighbors. Neighbors was pretty good. Dan Witherspoon was there, invited me to LA.

I wanted to get laid by someone new, so I didn't go home with Bob. He was concerned I was hurt about his going home with Larry Gross. I wasn't. But I wanted somebody else.