Diaries

April 13 I had very sick Night but feel better this morning I desire to thank the fore the light of this day O my God and for all thy goodness to me Friday morning a presious meeting in my chamber. how infinitely good is God. still to continue his consolations to one who forfeits them every step of my progress, I think I felt a brokenness of heart in view of my sin of my life Memoirs of Andres Sherburne the last days journey Was generally through a dreary wilderness: and the road if it deserved the name, was exceedingly bad In Shelburn there were but few inhabitants Moses Ingall Esq and Fletcher Ingalls, his brother, were the Principal men of the place from both of those gentlemen I received many signal favors there an aged and Eminent saint /[hury] Father] lived with Fletcher, his mother was not in health at this time

14th the lord god is a sun and shield; the lord will give grace and glory: no good thing will he with hold from them that walk uprightly, I feel thankfull for the light of this morning and that I am more comfortable Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, Believe also in me, in my fathers house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you Saturday evening the Rev Mr Smith and his wife came and take tea and in the evening I had meeting and very good one and a number of my nabours came in

15 Now we bid this sabbath welcome: hosanna to the son of David, blessed is he that cometh in the lord, hosanna in the highest. O that we may be in the spirit on this lords day: that this may be the sabbath of the lord in our dweling, in our hearts a sabbath of rest in god. the weather is very cold and damp, so that I cannot go to church this morning, what a great blessing to have health to meet with the great assembly of the saints. Lord. give me grace to deny ourselves to take up our cross daily, and to follow christ, to keep under the body. and bring it unto subjection, My friend Miss Nancy Emerson spent the sabbath with me and we had prayers in my chamber between the meetings, prayer makes the darkened cloud withdraw prayer climbs the ladder jacob saw, gives exercise to faith and love,

O that I had nothing else to do but to praise the lord our God with our whole heart and mouth O that thou didst never want to eat nor drink, nor sleep, but couldst in always praise God: and be employed solely in spiritual exercises, then I wouldst be much more happy then now, Mans chief end is to glorify God. and enjoy him for ever, chief end. that which ought to be mans chief aim and design and which he should seek as his chief happiness to glorify God to do him honor, as the most glorious and most excellent being April 16 East wind, and it affects my weak frame very much O come, let us sing unto the lord: let us heartily rejoice in the strength of our salvtion. let us come before his presence with thanksgiving: and shew ourselves glad in him with psalms, I am safe, and I am happy, While in thy Dear arms I lie Sin nor Satan cannot hurt me, While my Saviour is so nigh."

this morning Dr Ingalls call to see me. we had solemn conversation to gether a bout my Dear Son and Lydia and his wife he mention the lost of a brother that affected him very much, then he thought that he never should feel a gain so but when he was call to part with his wife his grief was grater, I told him when I look at his son. there he had one to bear his name up, I am like absolem, he said that he had no choice and if all his children were daughters he would be contented then why thus heavy, O my soul, say, why distrustful still: thy thoughts with vain impatience roll on scenes of future ill

17 A stormy and rainy day I had good night sleep O give thanks unto the lord for he is good for his mercy endureth for ever the lord my shepherd is. I shall be well supplied. Since he is mine and I am his What can I want beside. If ever I go astray. he doth my soul reclaim and guide me in his own right way for his most holy name. Christian Philosopher: the connection of science and Philosophy with religion illustrated with engravines Be Thomas Dick we have spent this day in reading this book, Almighty God, had done much more, nor is his arm impaired through length of days - and what he can he will: his faithfulness stands bound to see it is done. "

April 18 The wind is east and rain and cold we have been kept from all danger in the night and woke in comfortable health, and our hearts have been raised and warm in prayr to god this morning, my dear young friend united in prayr, she told me that in the night she felt that she lay in the arms of christ, O what lovely thing to see a young christen devoted to their saviour, Turn thee unto me, and have mercy upon me, for I am desolate and in misery: the sorrows of my heart ar enlarged: O bring thou me out of all my troubles look upon my adversity and misery, and forgive me all my sins. O keep my soul, and deliver me, let me not be confounded, for I have put my trust in thee, through jesus christ our lord, O how I pitty mothers that have not children to symithise (sympathize?) with them in there sorrows and in there weakness My poor mother has not one to smooth her pillow I wish that I could have her with me in her last day to comfort her at the close of life

Miss White from Brookfield call here to see me She is a goine Foreign Mission, and she is to be married to Mr Tracy he is to translate the Bible in china She spend the Summer at Miss Grant at Ipswich to prepare her the mission, and in giving up her self I hope she obey her lord jesus, that whosoever will save his life shall lose it, and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it our saviour also says, that he who having put his hand to the plough looketh back is not fit for the kingdom of God 19 this morning is rain continues cold East wind and the Spring is very backward for the season, and I feel the effect me very much. My dear Miss Emerson left us this morning after prayers, she conversed with Mr Knapp on the great subject of Religion I hope that will be blessed to him, her desire to do good all ways and she recommend the religion of her saviour, Tis the mind that makes the body rich And as the sun breaks through the darkest clouds So honor peareth in the meanest habit

April 20 Good Friday O the goodness of God in proloning my life to this anniversary day, O may the dear people keep this fast to the lord and have their souls fed with bread of eternal life this day is the last of lent, Fore year past Lydia and myself keep forty day lent we atte no meat all that time, no one knew of our keeping it but our self, we felt much happier and injoyed the fast O that my frail body would permit me to keep a fast I know that the lord is able to strength me, if I look to him for a blessing Almighty God we beseech the Graciously to behold thus thy famley for which our lord jesus christ was contented to be betrayed, and given up into the hands of wicked men, and to suffer death upon the cross : who now livith and reigneth with thee and the holy ghost over one god. world wothout end, Amen.

Rain and snow and cold so that I am oblidge to stay at home from church my ill health and many sorrows, were I to sit down and brood over the various circumstances of my late sorrowful bereavement, it would unfit me for every active duty My mind would dwell upon its own personal calamities, till my health would be more undermined, and all the faculties I posess prostrated, O when I think my son will never will return - O how bitter - but my blessed saviour, shall I rit down in despair, is there nothing left me to do and may I not be happy in doing thy will, is not that the best hapiness Oh may I bear some humble part in that immortal song Wonder and joy shall fill my heart, and love inspire my tongue My dear sisters did not come this morning as usual for the rain and storm prevent them friday morning -